Do you expect your partner to know what you need without asking? Are your ideas of romance straight from a Hollywood movie? Then it's time to rehab your relationship for the real world!
Psychotherapist and life coach Didi Zaharides joined us with some simple ways we can all have a better relationship:
- Communicate unspoken expectations. Be clear about what you want and what you need; avoid making assumptions. People are not mind readers.
- Don’t compare: Either your relationship or your spouse. Set your expectations based on your needs, not your best friend’s marriage, parent’s relationship, a television show, etc. If you find discussion focusing on another person’s relationship bring the focus back to you.
- Don't Hold Your Partner Up to Impossible Standards; often we expect more from our mate than we do from a friend or family member. This is unfair.
- Be realistic about your relationship as time passes and challenges occur. Initially we spend time trying to please one another, completely focused on the other person’s needs, yet over time our own needs can be left unmet. This is when we blame the relationship.
- Increase your effort. Whatever you are doing --- do more. Often we get busy and forget about the person who is most important to us.
- Know yourself first. Are you giving what you are asking to get? It is important to bring something to the relationship and not expect him/her to fulfill everything for you.
- Find time for yourselves as a couple. Participate in fun activities and notice how your expectations change. When we are happy, we are more realistic.
For more information, visit Didi's website.