The Upside of Anger

Anger may be a good thing. Self-esteem Coach Laure Redmond joined us with a look at a few of the benefits being mad can bring us:

  1. Anger is a powerful messenger telling you that something is going on beneath the surface that isn’t working. Whether it is fear or loss of control or something else entirely, look for that message and face the choices that this information provides.
  2. Sometimes what looks like a fight is only the fierceness of love.  It's a lot easier to be angry with someone than it is to tell him or her you're hurt. Appropriately asserting yourself rather than holding in anger often facilitates a closer relationship.
  3. People who respond to stressful situations with short-term anger or indignation have a sense of control and optimism that is lacking in those who respond from fear.
  4. Check your expectations, since anger may be telling you that your expectations are too high or that the boundaries are not clear enough.
  5. Anger provides opportunity.  Our anger management styles are learned from our own parents. If mom was a yeller, we may follow her example, even if we vowed never to yell at our kids. Fortunately, if you learned one anger expression style you can learn another. Separate the idea that feeling anger is bad. What you do with those hot emotions is completely under your control. Take a class or read a book on anger management.
  6. Anger is energy – find a physical outlet, like visiting a driving range or a batting cage, take a spin class, kick a soccer ball, list your frustrations on a bunch of rocks and throw them into a river one by one.
  7. Anger gives you a voice and can teach you how to talk about your feelings, even if they’re not pretty.
  8. We are the world. Convert anger into a social positive and make an improvement in the world.

For more information, visit Laure's website.  Or join her at a free event:

  • Letting Go of Fear
  • The Ledding Library Pond House
  • Wednesday evening: 8/12/09, 7:00 – 8:30 p.m.
  • Located at: 2215 S.E. Harrison St., Milwaukie, OR 97222
  • This event is FREE and space is limited. First come, first serve.
  • Call 503-786-7580
to register.


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