Executive Life Coach Stephanie Somanchi, MBA, explained why keeping your word to others is not enough.
When we make commitments and promises to ourselves that are not kept it erodes our sense of self-integrity and self-trust. In the same way that we lose faith in those who don’t keep their word to us, we begin to see our own voice as a lie and treat it with the same disdain as people who don’t keep their word to us. Example: You roll your eyes at yourself when you make promises of health, self-care, or development. “Yeah, sure!”
Rebuilding your sense of self-trust takes time and begins with a careful assessment about what receives your commitment. By starting small and following through you can reform your inner-liar.
Simply being aware that your word matters changes the way you act towards yourself.
2. Start Small
Building trust takes time. Start with a small promise and follow through. Doing this consistently builds internal confidence that you will keep your word.
Example: Take a ten minute walk. Maybe you’ll do more, but by keeping the small commitment first you enhance your inner-integrity.
3. Be Careful What You Promise
Grand plans can easily fail. Making self-promises that are dependent on other’s behaviors or that have an ambiguous time-line are ripe for undermining your ability to keep your word and do not enhance self-trust.
Example: You can promise yourself that you will apply for the new job, but not that you will get it.
Make keeping promises to yourself an even higher priority than keeping your word to others.
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