Delilah, Marvelle, Romance Novelist, and author of Lady of Pleasure (available tomorrow), had advice for increasing your romance quotient this srping.
SPRING INTO ROMANCE
1.) Dive into fun. When we think of romance, we think of flowers and chocolates. That’s all lovely but the memories of it don’t last, nor do they genuinely build your relationship. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, focus on having fun and you’ll be surprised at the connections you can make. Join an art class together or if you’re single, join an art class knowing that you may meet someone and that it may turn into an unexpected bonding experience. It’s all about diving into doing off the beaten path things and building your interests and making bonds.
2.) Trust your instinct. A lot of people look to experts for tips on romance when in fact, no one can tip you off better than yourself. Your interests, your humor, and everything that makes you YOU is what lends to the ultimate romance. If you’re in a relationship, no one knows your partner better than you. Dig into that and dig into what you know they would find romantic. And if you don’t know, ask what they would consider romantic and build on it. There is no single end all to romance because everyone’s relationship is unique, but trust yourself to do more and be more and you will be surprised to find you have the makings of Casanova.
3.) Manage your expectations. If you’re single, is your list of all the things you want in a relationship 100 pages long? Go through those 100 pages and toss out superficial expectations. Tall, dark and handsome is not a requirement. Love and romance can’t be labeled and so don’t box yourself in. Be open to more than what you have on your list. If you’re in a relationship, the same applies. Remember that neither of you are perfect and that your frustrations toward your partner end up stripping the romance out of the relationship. Try to remember what brought you two together in the first place and build on that.
4.) Flirt, write love notes to tuck into their pocket and leave each other unexpected surprises, like bringing them lunch or flowers to work just because you love them. In this modern way of life, we get caught up in the rush of our own lives we forget to think about others. It doesn’t take much time to write ‘I love you’ on a piece of paper and tuck it into their pocket or into their purse. Don’t tell them about it. Let them be surprised. It turns a bad day into a wonderful day every time. If you’re single, who says you can’t randomly offer to flirt with someone you just met? Take the time to make them feel special. Whether you just met them or whether you’ve been married for twenty five years, it’s all about making them feel special.
5.) Turn off those cell phones and go on a date that involves one on one time. We are so accessible to the world we forget to be accessible and make time for the one person who matters most. Turn off that cell phone and surprise your date with a unique experience that doesn’t involve a movie or a computer. It should involve uninterrupted one on one time. Go to the beach to fly a kite. Buy a cookbook, go shopping for things you need and cook dinner together. Go to the park for a picnic. It’s all about making the time and connecting on a genuine level.
6.) Create an “I was thinking of you” basket. Is your special someone working extra hours? Are they stressed about something? Put together a small basket with their favorite things and include other things like eye drops for those long hours spent in front of the computer and a coffee card to keep them going, letting them know that you’ve been paying attention to their struggles. It will make them smile even when they don’t feel like it. Set that basket on the car seat for them with a note, have it delivered to their office or leave it for them on the kitchen table.