From Tibet to Seattle, the journey of an enduring chef

The dumpling is filled with a savory yak meat mixture, her life with stories of heartbreak.

Both the momo and Thonden were born in Tibet. Thonden hasn't set foot in her home country since she was a young girl, but there are parts of her that will never leave Tibet.

Thonden was just 10 when she and her family left their home in Lhasa in the middle of the night, taking with them only what they could carry. Her father had decided there was no other way.

"My father was (imprisoned for) three years in Chinese prison, hard labor. When he was released, my father said, 'Now is the time to escape. It's not safe to stay in Tibet,'" she said.

Thonden's father was not involved in politics, but his work didn't sit well with the Chinese government, she said.

Cranberry-topped momos

When he was abruptly taken away, Thonden and her family didn't know whether they'd see him again, and for good reason. Her grandfather, a high-ranking official under the Dalai Lama, had been imprisoned, then killed.

"When he was killed, the Chinese -- they call us," said Thonden, adding the family was ordered to come to the prison. "And they give us order: 'You guys sit in front.'"

The family then had to watch as guards brutally beat Thonden's grandfather.

"They were beating him. Then they took him back to the prison and after one week, we got message that (said), 'Your grandfather is no more here.' He was killed in the prison," she said.

So when her father was released alive, he decided to pack up the family and attempt escape on foot. Thonden's brother was just 8, her sister 6.

"Daytime, we hide ourselves in the jungle, and nighttime, we walk and walk, and walk," Thonden said. "Almost one and a half months to two months, we were walking."

The family was always on alert, and only ate when they could.

"We look in the grass and if there is something to eat, then (we ate)," said Thonden. "We look in the daytime, you know, what can we eat? So, some fruit."

The long journey was especially difficult for Thonden's younger siblings.

"One time, my brother was so hungry he ate something, you know, some fruit, which was kind of poison. And his face becomes like this," Thonden said, gesturing a swollen face. Thonden's sister "was only 6, so she was crying. She says, 'I need food. I need food.' We don't have anything."

After about six weeks, the family reached India. But their journey wasn't yet over; they had to walk to Dharamsala, home of the exiled Tibetan government.

Life in India

Thonden and her siblings attended a refugee school in Dharamsala for a time, but were soon split up. Her brother was sent to Norway for education, her sister to Switzerland. Thonden ended up at a missionary school in Thangu, India.

"And then we didn't see each other - I don't know where is my parents, my sister and brother. We were separated for 10 years," she said. After finishing high school and college in India, Thonden turned her attention to the kitchen, and attended the M.G. ("Mahatma Gahndi") Culinary College, focusing on Indian food.

After culinary school, the chef-to-be then turned her attention to the flavors of her home country.

"Then I ... specialized in Tibetan food with a very famous Tibetan chef. I was with him almost two years," she said. "That's why I make my own spices. My teacher said, 'Taste it. If you like it, make it.' So I'm making everything myself."

In the following years, Thonden dove into cooking. She got married to a Tibetan man, and they had two sons. She also located her parents and siblings, one by one.

Then in 1992, her fate took another turn. She and her husband's name were among the 1,000 Tibetan chosen for the U.S. resettlement project. Thonden's husband and their two sons moved to the U.S. She herself followed four years later.

Cooking for the Dalai Lama

Thonden and her family started anew in Seattle, where she began working for Tom Douglas.

But her Tibetan roots soon came calling.

The Dalai Lama gestures during a religious talk at the Tsuglakhang temple in Dharmsala, India.

Thonden and a Tibetan chef from New York traveled to Canada to cook for the Dalai Lama.

"There was one side Canadian chefs, one side French chefs and one side Tibetan chefs. So we did Tibetan food and everybody likes it. They love very much," said Thonden. "It was very good for me."

And on her last day came yet another unexpected opportunity -- a chance to visit with the Dalai Lama.

"His Holiness was asking me, 'Do you have your own restaurant here?' And I said I don't. And he said, 'Are you working for somebody?' I said, 'Yes, I'm working for Tom Douglas. And it's an American restaurant.'

"And he was just joking, 'You are making Tibetan food in American restaurant?' I said, 'Yes, just a small part.' And he said, 'Be nice and be kind. Help if you can. This is our policy to help each other if you can. Don't harm anybody. And don't let us down, OK?" said Thonden. "It was really fun and really very good for me."

When the Dalai Lama visited Seattle, Thonden was called upon to cook for him once again -- an opportunity she relished.

'I was so happy. I am so happy'

When Tom Douglas approached Thonden about opening a Tibetan restaurant, she didn't have to think twice.

"I was so happy. I am so happy," she said, "because we don't have Tibetan restaurant in here."

Thonden agrees not much is known about Tibetan food to Americans, and she can't wait to serve up her hometown cuisine.

"Everything (is) made by hand. Tibetans, we think ... handmade food is much more delicious. So we are not using too much machine; everything we are doing by hand."

Thonden is Douglas' chef du cuisine of Ting Momo, which will open in South Lake Union in April. The restaurant will offer several types of homemade dumplings, as well as soup with hand-pulled noodles.

For the chef, the new restaurant is a homecoming of sorts.

"We can't go back to Tibet. You know, that is not safe for us. I really want to go and see. When I was 10 years old, I left my motherland and since then, I can't see. So yes, I really want to go, but it is not safe for me," she said. "I can't go to Tibet but I can share all my food, you know. I can share my stories."

Thonden's journey has been one peppered with heartbreaks.

She still thinks about those weeks she and her family spent walking their way to freedom, even though, as she puts it, "Now we are OK." Her sister is now in Montreal, her brother in India, where lies another loved one.

When Thonden left for the U.S., she had to leave her elderly father behind.

"He was almost 78 years old," she said. What she did not know at the time was that she'd not see him again.

"I was going to India to visit my father, then my brother called me at night and (said) my father has passed. So I could not see him," said Thonden, tears glistening in her eyes.

As she makes each momo - her personal favorite - by hand, she pays tribute to her father, her homeland, her life's journey. With each fold of the dough, she recounts the countless steps she's taken in decades past.

"It is good for me," she said.

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Video by KOMO News digital media producer Vienna Catalani.