Student's suicide shines light on 'chronic blushing'
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SEATTLE -- Blushing is something we all do when we're embarrassed or ashamed.
At worst, it's uncomfortable, but for one University of Washington student blushing hurt so much that suicide seemed to be the only way to make it stop.
On Tuesday, May 29, student Brandon Thomas jumped to his death from the University of Washington's McMahon Hall.
"He jumped from his dorm balcony. It was 13 stories," said Brandon's father, Steve Thomas.
Brandon, just 20-years old, died instantly, just as he'd planned.
"When we got the call the day he took his life, I never asked -- neither one of us asked. We knew," said his mother, Dawn Thomas.
What Dawn and Steve knew instantly was that their son's secret life of torment had pushed him to the brink, and then over it.
"It breaks my heart knowing that I couldn't save him from this, and as a parent you want to save your kids from everything," Dawn said. "Even though he was 20, he was still my little boy and I couldn't save him from it."
While they knew he was suffering, Steve said he didn't think suicide was a choice that Brandon would ever make.
In a five-page suicide letter to his parents and twin brother Devin, Brandon revealed he was psychologically crippled and drained by a relatively unknown medical condition called chronic blushing. He considered himself cursed. Every day, multiple times a day, he blushed uncontrollably for no reason.
"It was impacting him every minute of his life. That broke my heart watching it," Dawn said.
With chronic blushing, an overactive nervous system triggers uncontrollable blushing. Brandon's fear of turning red made him even more red.
Brandon hated that others assumed he was embarrassed, ashamed or lacked confidence. In his suicide note, he wrote that his blushing would prevent him from ever having a career, a relationship or any kind of normal life.
"He said this was exhausting and no one should have to live this way and him jumping would bring awareness to the medical community," Dawn said.
Brandon's parents say no one should have to die to make a difference. They understand his desperation, but don't condone suicide.
In an effort to help others suffering from the condition, the family launched a website in Brandon's honor that offers sufferers a place for hope and help.
Brandon considered surgery to stop the blushing, but when he was given only a 50-50 chance of success, he lost hope. His final wish was that his story would be told and he could help others.
"There are numerous people who have said (the website) saved their life. The most recent, a young cop from London who was one week away from taking his life," Steve said.
Next to Brandon's suicide note, his parents found his "Bucket List" of things he'd like to do before he died. Included on the list were sky diving, growing a beard, conquering blushing and saving a life.
Joshua Hanson represents a live saved. The daily blushing episodes started for the Tenino teen in high school.
"He described it as a flushing feeling. He felt like heat rising up through his face. He would get very, very red and his ears would almost turn purple," said Sheri Hanson, Joshua's mom.
His parents tried to make light of it, but Joshua got their attention over the summer when he told them he couldn't go to college until he got help for his blushing.
That's when Sheri found the Thomas family's blushing website.
"I read his story and heard his parents cry out for Brandon and I just knew I had to do something," Sheri said.
Now a freshman linebacker at Portland State University, Joshua has been blush free since his surgery in August.
"My earnest hope is that other young people would find hope through this story and they would get help," Sheri said.
Experts say the surgery to treat chronic blushing is not for everyone. After surgery, patients lose the ability to sweat from their head. Brandon's parents call the procedure risky and controversial.
One thing both parents said is that they learned that hard way to never tease a blusher, because it may be a condition they can't control.
More information about Brandon and chronic blushing is available online.
At worst, it's uncomfortable, but for one University of Washington student blushing hurt so much that suicide seemed to be the only way to make it stop.
On Tuesday, May 29, student Brandon Thomas jumped to his death from the University of Washington's McMahon Hall.
"He jumped from his dorm balcony. It was 13 stories," said Brandon's father, Steve Thomas.
Brandon, just 20-years old, died instantly, just as he'd planned.
"When we got the call the day he took his life, I never asked -- neither one of us asked. We knew," said his mother, Dawn Thomas.
What Dawn and Steve knew instantly was that their son's secret life of torment had pushed him to the brink, and then over it.
"It breaks my heart knowing that I couldn't save him from this, and as a parent you want to save your kids from everything," Dawn said. "Even though he was 20, he was still my little boy and I couldn't save him from it."
While they knew he was suffering, Steve said he didn't think suicide was a choice that Brandon would ever make.
In a five-page suicide letter to his parents and twin brother Devin, Brandon revealed he was psychologically crippled and drained by a relatively unknown medical condition called chronic blushing. He considered himself cursed. Every day, multiple times a day, he blushed uncontrollably for no reason.
"It was impacting him every minute of his life. That broke my heart watching it," Dawn said.
With chronic blushing, an overactive nervous system triggers uncontrollable blushing. Brandon's fear of turning red made him even more red.
Brandon hated that others assumed he was embarrassed, ashamed or lacked confidence. In his suicide note, he wrote that his blushing would prevent him from ever having a career, a relationship or any kind of normal life.
"He said this was exhausting and no one should have to live this way and him jumping would bring awareness to the medical community," Dawn said.
Brandon's parents say no one should have to die to make a difference. They understand his desperation, but don't condone suicide.
In an effort to help others suffering from the condition, the family launched a website in Brandon's honor that offers sufferers a place for hope and help.
Brandon considered surgery to stop the blushing, but when he was given only a 50-50 chance of success, he lost hope. His final wish was that his story would be told and he could help others.
"There are numerous people who have said (the website) saved their life. The most recent, a young cop from London who was one week away from taking his life," Steve said.
Next to Brandon's suicide note, his parents found his "Bucket List" of things he'd like to do before he died. Included on the list were sky diving, growing a beard, conquering blushing and saving a life.
Joshua Hanson represents a live saved. The daily blushing episodes started for the Tenino teen in high school.
"He described it as a flushing feeling. He felt like heat rising up through his face. He would get very, very red and his ears would almost turn purple," said Sheri Hanson, Joshua's mom.
His parents tried to make light of it, but Joshua got their attention over the summer when he told them he couldn't go to college until he got help for his blushing.
That's when Sheri found the Thomas family's blushing website.
"I read his story and heard his parents cry out for Brandon and I just knew I had to do something," Sheri said.
Now a freshman linebacker at Portland State University, Joshua has been blush free since his surgery in August.
"My earnest hope is that other young people would find hope through this story and they would get help," Sheri said.
Experts say the surgery to treat chronic blushing is not for everyone. After surgery, patients lose the ability to sweat from their head. Brandon's parents call the procedure risky and controversial.
One thing both parents said is that they learned that hard way to never tease a blusher, because it may be a condition they can't control.
More information about Brandon and chronic blushing is available online.
This is a very sad story. What makes it worse are some rude comments by armchair quarterbacks making postings that not enough was done by the parents. This young man was in college and those first years leaving home are a risky time for any child, so I see a multitude of things coming into play here.  Whenever someone changes their enviroment and separates from their safety net and support group there is bound to be an increase in anxiety and stress. Expectations are high in a college enviroment.  There are elements in this relocating  that are some of the leading causes of mental health issues or stress related breakdowns. Suicide is not a logical act and the Brandon that his parents knew was not the one that made this decision. Â
Wow... I'm sorry to say, but this is the worst reason of any I've heard for suicide. It may have been in the story, but I didn't see where this kids parents had gotten him some mental health treatment. The poor guy could really have used it.
Too bad nobody helped him deal with blushing. Better red than dead
I have this problem! What really helps me is anti-depressent medication. It actually helps stop the blushing.Â
Would male-up cover up the blushing
@Bert no not at all
I can't help but think there was more tormenting this young man than just blushing.  By any definition he is was a good looking kid and most girls think blushing is cute, so I don't get it.
Oh my gosh, I had never heard of such a thing. How sad that his affliction drove him to suicide. This is truly dying of embarrassment. My heart goes out to his family. This really makes me sad.
That's tough. Though for the kid to kill himself would suggest much deeper issues than "I turn red all the time".Â
Sad but pathetic, there are people in this world who are severly disfigured either because of a tragic accident or they were born that way and I guarantee these people who are TRULY disfigured would KILL to look completely normal and only have a "blushing" problem. What kind of shallow, insecure, weak crap is this? To kill yourself over blushing when millions of ppl are struggling to live and fighting for life with cancer, aids, severe disfigurement, etc. SO OBSURD! Bad acne, freckles, etc can be embarrassing too but worth suicide? WTF is our world coming to?
@gale1989Â you might be good looking on the outside but you are UGLY on the inside.
No I am not ugly on the inside, I am just sick and tired of you idiots babying this pathetic behavior. It IS very sad this boy felt no other option but it IS pathetic that he was so insecure and SHALLOW that a minor disorder like BLUSHING can push him to this. THERE ARE PEOPLE FIGHTING THROUGH CHEMO WHO ARE BALD PEOPLE WITH AIDS WHO HAVE SORES ALL OVER THEM AND THEY'D GIVE ANYTHING TO TRADE THEIR MISERY FOR A PERFECTLY HEALTHY BODY ASIDE FROM UNCONTROLLED BLUSHING.
In this day and age we are making our children into a bunch of weenies. If you ask my grandpa, he would say in his day if you have a blushing problem or some kind of appearance issue, you suck it up and have some confidence in yourself, you don't baby your kids and feel sorry for them, you teach them to be strong and not worry about what people think. I have plenty of sympathy for people going through a rough time, but SUICIDE??? Again, there are people that would give anything to have just one more day, one more week of life and this kid threw it all away over BLUSHING
@gale1989Â no you are the pathetic one who seems to think that you are an expert on why this young man really chose to commit suicide, could it be because of IDIOTS like yourself who didn't have any sympathy for what he was going through.Â
SHAME ON YOU AND YOUR PATHETIC BLAMING OF A SUICIDE VICTIM. You never walked in his shoes so you have no idea.... And to say that freckles are embarrassing?! Really? Bet you think red hair or being Asian or African is embarrassing too. Shallow-minded loser. Way to hurt the deceased kid's family. Grow a conscience and a heart or shut up.
Go ask anyone in a wheelchair who can never walk again if they'd trade places and just have a blushing problem. I guarantee you can't find ONE person that wouldn't trade! What a waste of a perfectly good body and life, this is a selfish, shallow act in this case and it angers me. Of course my heart goes out the parents, this is a tragedy for them but the action itself is PATHETIC
@gale1989Â so you have talked to every single person who is in a wheel chair, I doubt that you have so why do you have the need to be a liar.Â
my significant other is KOREAN and I HAVE FRECKLES, no I am not some shallow-minded loser, I DO think this is sad and my heart DOES go out to the family but despite all that this is VERY PATHETIC when there are people struggling for the next breath, people with really severe physical disfigurement, people losing every last hair on their head fighting cancer, people who returned from war with half their face blown off, people who would give ANYTHING to trade all that for a blushing problem. So stop babying this type of behavior and feel sad that this kid wasted a perfectly healthy body and life when others are struggling just to live another day.
i think you are missing the point, I think this is tragic and I think it sucks that someone felt so bad about their uncontrollable blushing that they'd get this extreme. But cmon lady, how can you sit here and say this is not pathetic when there are millions who'd give anything for another day of life and this perfeclty healthy kid threw it away over something like blushing? Go cry in a corner somewhere
@gale1989Â and you are struggling to be empathetic to someone that you have no of everything that they were going through,Â
My heart go's out to this young man and his family, so very sad.
OMG. Â I totally understand his discomfort/embarrassment. Â I am fair-skinned and have always suffered with chronic blushing. Â It was so awful how the kids would pick on me all through school. Â Even still, co-workers get a good kick out of making me turn red. Â I can laugh it off now, I accept it's just part of me, but when I was a kid it was truly a torment.
@oregonchick76Â
Same thing happened to me and I still blush at 65! It still bothers me! My husband and I were both fair skinned and we had 3 fair skinned boys.   I just asked my 40 year old son if it bothered him in school and he said that it did, but he found ways to retaliate...oh dear:(  Things that happen to us when we are young can affect us the rest of our lives! We need to be kind to each other:) I'm so sorry for Brandon's family. Â
OMG, I knew someone like this in High School, and I don't think ANYONE had any idea that he would have had this condition, but you could always tell it hurt him inside really bad.
I suddenly just feel awful about the fact that we just didn't know. Ugh.
@brautigan At least you have a raised level of consciousness now. Feeling awful means your heart is alive and well.
This story hit home for me.  I could have been the Brandon of my day, fifty years ago. I too, suffered
excessive blushing and excessive sweating from age 15 to about age 20. It brought me to the brink of severe depression. So much so that I was forced to drop out of college after six months. I was quickly drafted
into the Army during the Viet Nam era.  That helped to build my self confidence and self esteem.
I
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@Shadow ~ I don't think it's a matter if being "selfish", Shadow...  Teenagers are very, very different... and many of them go through a time when they live only in "now"; they really don't have much of a grasp of the concept of "the future" ~ or that things will almost certainly be different (better) for them in the future... Feeling "unique" and/or "isolated" can also be elements; that is, feeling very certain that no one on earth ever experienced quite what they are going through...  I'm sure no expert on it, but I don't think that's as much "selfish" as it is the results of all the mish-mash of physical, hormonal, mental and emotional changes that teens go through as a natural part of growing up... Sometimes, what would be fairly easily handled in just a few more years, seems completely overwhelming... and their primary objective becomes a search for a way to end the pain...It is tragic and heart-breaking when suicide is the only way they see to end the pain...Â
Rest in peace, Brandon Thomas... my heartfelt condolences go to his family and friends for their loss.
@Shadow Thank you so much for your worthless speculation about a situation your know nothing about.  You are obviously a better and stronger person than this young man, and that really cheers me up after reading this sad story.
@Shadow You seriously need to understand that nobody here on this board right now cares about your acne as a teen; this isn't about YOU, but you should be grateful that you were tough, not gloat about it. If you can't find it in your heart to post something compassionate toward grieving parents, sod off. Brandon obviously felt hopeless, and it's too bad he didn't have the patience to hold out for eventual medical help, but by leaving a thoughtful five page letter to his family, he shows that he was definitely not selfish.
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Pay no attention to that moron Basruton. The idiot is starving for attention bcz he didn't get enough from mommy and daddy, the ignorant JERK!!
This world actually getting worse in crimes and haterism. We as a parents need to stand up and spend more time with our children to teach them how to stand up for themselves, how to handle bullying, depression other tough situations and to be confident and happy in their lifes. Get professional help if need it. Children is our future and how we want to see our future, that's how we should raise our children. Parents lets do our job better, work can wait, other things can wait, let's have our children first priority in our life's, enough of suicides. Money can just make your life better, but they can't give you happiness. Happiness is the key to success in our lives.
How very sad for this young man and his family... 20 is just too damn young to give up on life...
Y'know, looking at Brandon's picture, that smile reminds me a little of Ron Howard when he was about tat age...Â
So many dynamics at play here. Why the bucket list near the suicide note? Why choose death over a 50% chance at surgical correction? So very tragic and in my opinion a cause much deeper than his disorder.
This is so horrible. Truly horrible! What a handsome young man. Thomas Family: I am praying for Brandon, and you.
Are people looking into naturopathic treatments for this? I flush easily also, but I didn't care, and nobody ever really said anything about it. Sometimes my ears (or just one ear) will go bright red, and stay that way for hours. Freaky.
Please don't consider surgery that will stop your ability for your head to sweat! Your brain needs to be cooled off!
@pork chop good advice. Acupuncture works for so many things. NDs have good experience with adrenal gland treatment that could be involved in this kind of thing.
This goes along with chronic sweating. My oldest Son has to take multiple baths because of chronic sweating. Wears tank tops even in winter. Can be very embarrassing in certain situation. He has learned to make a joking remark about it and get on with whatever.
Too bad this young man could not-did not find a solution of this type that worked for him.
Chronic sweating makes for a wet shirt all around! Very obvious!
@Yamhill354 anyone check his thyroid function including the thyroid antibodies?(which are usually ignored but can be connected to this)
@Yamhill354Â That's itâjust make a joke and go on. Sweating is lifeâif you do not sweat it's very, very serious. I know, because I've lost the ability to sweat normally.Â
@pork chop @Yamhill354  Chronic Sweating is NO JOKE it too is a condition caused by a mal -functioning signal the same as blushing all the time. Fluid simply pours out of those with the condition. And they must find a way to accept this. It both looks bad and makes the person smell bad. And the person with the problem MUST find a way to deal with the embarrassment. Stating the fact in joking smiling way to those you must work with, IS one way to deal with it. An the person must drink a very large amount of fluids to keep hydrated when it is pouring out of all their pores.
I have always blushed easily - and it definitely has made for some awkward situations. I am saddened that this boy didn't have the skills to work with it. I hope this story helps someone else. I just don't understand.....why can't people just leave others alone? Worry about their own issues.Â
@Somonecaresaboutsomething  Because that would mean acknowledging their own insecurities and fears. It's easier for them to put someone down than to work a lttle harder to lift them up.
This is very sad and I feel for the parents & the young man..
That said, one of my sons ALWAYS had bright red cheeks.. Always.. We told him "he glowed" and that his rosy cheeks made him look friendly to others. We raised him to believe his physical difference ENHANCED the special "one of a kind person" he was and still is.Â
THAT is how to handle differences.. Celebrate them..Â
@cwpholder Probably the best and perhaps the only way to handle something like this. Kudos to you Mom!
"Brandon hated that others assumed he was embarrassed, ashamed or lacked confidence. In his suicide note, he wrote that his blushing would prevent him from ever having a career, a relationship or any kind of normal life."Â
Seems to me Brandon lacked basic communication skills and while it is very sad he choose this route, there were many more options availiable to him.  He choose darkness instead of light. Notice it says he "assumed", and "would prevent him from ever." He did not know these things and assumed.  At 20 things are still not as they will be in an adult world.  Perhaps he assumed wrong?Â
I feel for the parents but this is hardly an issue to scold society in general over because one boy couldnt come to terms with it.
@jpdx00Â
Hard thing is that people at that age haven't fully developed the part of their brain that would help them in a situation like what he was going through.
And yes, society should be scolded. More and more people are making fun of others, bullying them, etc. and it is leading to a number of suicides. People need to understand that their words, laughter, etc. have power over others, especially teens and those in their early 20s.
@Jenni S. @jpdx00 ~  Um-hmm... and it's compounded these days by use of the Internet (social networks), sometimes used in order to post photos, cruel statements / jokes, and so on about people who are perceived as "different"...  and the worst part is that once that kind of cr*p is on these sites, it's there permanently...  This can be devastating to kids and teens, even older teens...Â
Success forecasts for surgeries rarely have odds better than 50/50! Any decent gambler would jump on those odds and backed the bet all-in! My recent back surgery was given 30/70 odds for success. I'm very happy with the results. This young man would have been alive and very happy today, as well, I'm sure, if only his surgeon would have presented the choice in a much more positive way.
@Darktan OnionÂ
It wasn't just the 50-50 odds, but also the side effects of the surgery. Inability for your head to sweat could cause bigger issues than the blushing, for instance.
@Jenni S. Very true, and thank you for pointing that out. However, I would think that any such side-effects would be small potatoes in comparison to something so permanent as death, don't you?
It's too bad he wasn't strong enough to bring awareness to this condition in life rather than death. I never heard of chronic blushing, now I know.
RIP Brandon.